feel the energy required

Standing in a river
waist-deep
feel the energy required
in your deepest muscles
to fight against the current
to stay still
where you are.

The river, the water, the current,
your life,
wants to sweep you away
in flow
but you resist.

Feel the energy required
to resist the flow of life.
You want to stay, here, or there,
but wouldn’t it be easier
to relax your muscles
lift your feet from the riverbed
and submit to the current?

Parts of the forest
can be seen and appreciated only
from the river’s view.
Relinquish control
release the past
and let the water carry you.

weather permission

There are days
like today
I need the weather
to grant me permission
to slow down.

Fluffy clumps of frozen water
fall in a parade
beyond the window pane.
Hypnotizing.

Fighting my body
to move, to work,
to achieve productivity.
Fighting against will.

Sit, rest,
watch the snow fall.
This is needed, too.

The fight rages on.

Fighting against a force within me,
I cannot see it
nor assign it a name.
It urges me to retreat, recluse,
hide away from you, and me,
promising me peace and tranquility.

I feel another figure
rise up to the challenge,
rationalizing with me against every promise.
‘You know better than this’,
‘You are stronger than this’,
‘You must overcome this on your own’.

I listen to the rational voice
and head its advice,
but the other, deeper voice still calls out to me.

The fight rages on.

bird in the wind

Believe you are stronger than the wind.
Take another breath
flap your wings a few times more
change your angle slightly, if you must,
but keep going.
Keep fighting.
Just when you think you have nothing left
the gust will subside,
and surge forward, you will.

Believe you are stronger than the wind
and keep fighting.

up and out

Heat growing, building,
turning a darker, deeper shade of red
with each passing minute.
Transferring,
separating particles from each other.
Expanding,
until there is nowhere else
for the steam to go
but up
and out.

Eventually
the same will happen to me
as it has before.
With no where to go
but up, and out,
my lid will rattle
and bounce around
making music.

Fight me.

Fight me.
I need you to fight me.
Bulldoze down my walls,
tell me how I’m wrong and
show me how I’m wrong
stab me with the truth,
make sure I have a long way to fall.
I need that
a strong slap in the face
a bucket of cold water over my head
a violent shake for me to leave my head
and see the reality from your view.

Unleash on me
whatever method necessary
to penetrate my thick skull
remove the rotting roots
and plant a new seed.
Fight me.