Tag: longing

a movie of us

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

After all this time
you returned to my subconscious
drawing the curtains behind my closed eyes
to screen a movie
a movie of us
where we’re back there,
where we knew each other,
but also now, where we don’t.
How did you manage to combine
and intertwine them?

I could touch your skin
I could hear your voice.
You were there, with me,
real.
You were so real
that when the curtains spread
and my eyes opened
I looked around the room for you
hoping to find you
wanting what I realized was a dream
to be reality.

As hours pass today
the touch of your skin
the sound of your voice
and the energy between us
dissipates
until now
where I can hardly remember.

I cannot comprehend how or why
you came to me
but I thank you
and I hope to see you again soon.

More than anyone else

~ jennadawn ~ 2 Comments

More than anyone else from my past
I think of you.

I wonder where life has taken you,
whether it has pulled or guided you
to wherever you are now.

I wonder how much of your personality
would be exactly the same
as it was ten years ago,
like I remember.

I wonder of all the experiences
you have lived through
and how curious I am, and would be,
to hear about them.

I wonder at what it would be like
to see you again.

I wonder how those first few moments
of our reunion
would be filled.
Would there be tentativeness?
Would there be liberation?
Would there be comfort?

I wonder how those last few moments
of our reunion
would be filled.
Would there be longing?
Would there be satisfaction?
Would there be a strengthened friendship?

More than anyone else from my past
I think of you
and wonder
if you wonder these things about me, too.

come and go

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

People come,
enter our lives,
often we don’t see them coming
until there they are, standing in front of us,
asking us to join in their lives, too.

People go,
often too soon,
before we have a chance to say goodbye.
In their shadows we remain
drowning in words unsaid,
yearning for a reunion of any kind
to lighten the load on our shoulders.

People come, and they go,
sometimes to make room for more new arrivals
for we can only have so many, right?

When they go, I wonder where they go.
Do they, too, carry words left unsaid
like me?

community mourning

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

A year has gone by
without you here.

The pain, the sorrow, the longing
feels as fresh today
as one year ago.

I sit in community
with all who knew and loved you
as we remember
your smile, passion, love;
I can hear your laughter
ringing out and through the first snow.

We mourn you.
We miss you.
We love you.

on that day

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

One day
you will think of them
for the first time in a long time
and you will think you can go back to that time
when you were happy, with them,
but then you will look around
and remember
they are not here.

On that day,
I will be here for you.

it will not be the same as before

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

I believe, if I see you again,
it will not be the same as before.
We will both be different people
than the first time,
reuniting as new strangers
not old friends.

Maybe for the better
with us both in the same place
and at the right time,
a chance to try again
carve a new path together through the brush.

Maybe for the worse
with us still in different places
serving as a cold, stark reminder
that we will never be more
than what we are.

It will not be the same as before
for better or worse.

longing heart

~ jennadawn ~ Leave a comment

How do you tell them
how your heart aches to see them,
be near them, hear their story
and of the expansive burst in your chest
you feel the moment you see them?

When you say
“I’ve missed you”
or “It’s so good to see you”
do they also hear the words you want to say
but don’t?

Sometimes words cannot do justice
the bodily sensations of love and longing,
you know it by feeling
and hope they feel it too.