my mind running away

I think back to years ago
recalling small, singular events
of you, and me, and us.

I start with what I remember,
then my mind switches to imagination
and runs away.

As it runs away
it conjures stories and conversations
I know never happened,
but are real enough behind my eyes
I sit confused, uncertain.

Did we kiss?
Did we date?
Did we love each other?
Or,
did we end before we could begin?

leave this pain behind

I want to run away, escape,
leave this pain behind
in my rearview mirror
and dust.

I have learned what it sought
to teach me,
know where I still need to grow
and even how pain can help.
I know this. I understand this.
But I want it to go away.